What if?
/Our mothers mean so much to us, and in so many different ways. They care, they teach, they lead, they love, they nurture, they hold, they share, they give. "Mother" is an archetype and a very real, very human role, that arguably means more to us - and is felt more deeply by all human beings everywhere - than any other. Quite literally nothing is as ancient as our idea of The Mother, for even if we never knew our own – even if she left us before our memory took shape and other caregivers influenced our infancy and early years – the very notion of mother is something embedded in the bedrock of human consciousness. You feel it, don’t you? Even as you read these words…
I cannot possibly overstate the influence that my own mother has had in my life. She taught me the value of unconditional love, which is, to me, a gift beyond measure. And though there are many other treasures that she has left for me to collect - both intentional and also as part a larger, more mysterious karmic Path that has unfolded throughout our lives together – it is this one, beyond all others, has influenced all walks of my life. I am grateful for my mother; motherhood in general is something which I revere most highly. Indeed, my understanding of motherhood continues to grow and evolve for me, especially during this most recent season of my life.
Here is a poem that I wrote as a gift to my mother many years ago. In fact, it's one of the first poems I ever wrote. It was a gift for her then, when I was just a boy. Some years later, this poem found itself published in my first book, The Long Road Home. Today, it’s an offering to mothers everywhere. Mothers who teach, mothers who inspire. And to the archetype, the idea of “mother” that influences us all so very much.
There is a lesson here, in this poem, that I learned over time by observing my mother and listening her. It's a lesson about personal power, about surrender, about letting go and letting be. In the end, though, it's a lesson about love.
Thank you, mom.
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What if?
Many, many years ago,
(when I was just a boy),
I’d get so upset
when I couldn't have a toy.
I'd cry and ask my mother:
"What if it's not there next time?"
And my dear mom would teach me
This lesson built in rhyme:
"What if the rivers and seas dry up?
What if I die tomorrow?
What if our world ends today?
Our time here, son, we borrow.
But if you live each day its best,
and keep your faith in you,
all those ‘what if's’ will fade away
just like the morning dew."
Fifteen years down the road,
I wiped my tears away.
I kissed my mom a last goodbye,
it was my first college day.
I told her, "Mom, I'm so afraid.
What if I can't succeed?"
And then my mother said the words
I knew I had to heed.
"What if the rivers and seas dry up?
What if I die tomorrow?
What if our world ends today?
Our time here, son, we borrow.
But if you live each day its best,
and keep your faith in you,
all those ‘what if's’ will fade away
just like the morning dew."
Many years passed since that day,
with this lesson in my mind.
And I have led a happy life,
my loved ones by my side.
But the news of mother reached me
one cold, dark autumn day.
And quickly I was by her side
to love and cry and pray.
I told her, "Mom, I'm so afraid.
What if I can't go on?
What if I'm lost without you, mom?
You've been everything for so long."
While lying in her bed that night,
my mother pulled me near.
She whispered me her final words
and prayed that I would hear.
"What if the rivers and seas dry up?
What if I die tomorrow?
What if our world ends today?
Our time here, son, we borrow.
But if you live each day its best,
and keep your faith in you,
all those ‘what if's’ will fade away
just like the morning dew.
And when I've gone from this world
to watch you from above,
Don’t ever worry about ‘what if,’
you'll always have my love."
~for you, mom
© 2012 Brandon Thompson